16 March 2010

Suki With A Twist: Part One

The draft for Suki With A Twist: Part One is with three of my proof readers.  Initial response from one is it is "rough" and needs to be fleshed out.  I need to get more details from her while I make another pass through it and add the corrections another proofreader noticed.

Sounds like this one reads faster.  Both said they couldn't put it down and both are familiar with the other books.  Might hear something from Derek today, for a third opinion.

I had to split this work into two books because of a constraint I gave myself.  The romance readers like their books between 20,000 and 40,000 words.  Even though this is action/adventure/sci-fi, it has a heavy romance theme and the people I know who read a lot of that like my stories too.

So, when I was approaching 35,000 words I noticed there was no way this story would be finished before 40,000.  I modified the outline and continued the story until I reached the limit, then re-worked the end of "Part One" and the beginning of "Part Two."

Part one does have the right elements, in my opinion, to be a complete story, just not the whole story of a relationship.  When "Part Two" is complete, the reader will have the whole story of the relationship between John and Suki.

The term "With A Twist" is in the title as both a description and a warning.  This set of two books is a departure from the origonal series, more like a bizarro paralell story.  The same core characters are present, but some are in different lines of work than they were in the original Suki series.  I tried to keep them all with the same personalities, reacting the same way to things as they would have reacted in the main series, but they are in much different situations.  Also, I set the beginning of the story about one year earlier than Suki I.  The only clues I left for that are the ages of John and Suki.

As soon as I read the fan fiction that Suki and Sarah wrote, I embraced it as part of the main series and I continue using their gadgetry in the Suki With A Twist books. Update: ISBN is 1451551827 and EAN-13 is 9781451551822 have just been assigned to this book.

Will start working on Suki VI, or whatever I name the next book of the main Suki series, after I get these two finished and available in paperback.

Suki Series Background
Suki Series Tech
Order the paperback edition of Suki V: The Collection
Browse the series on Google:
Suki I, Suki II, Suki III, Suki IV, Suki V
Fan Fiction: John and Suki: Vacation Fun

John and Suki's news and comment area, from a Libertarian perspective.

Copyright 2009, 2010, SJE Enterprises, all rights reserved.

1 comment:

  1. John,

    Did a writeup on Facebook for this. I think that Facebook link only works if you have an account. Hint hint!


    Figured I should start a new topic for the upcoming book. Finished my first read of the draft last night and sent John the corrections I noticed. Good thing: it is a "Part One". Bad thing: I don't know what happens in "Part Two" yet!

    Some basics for this one. It should be called an alternate series or something. The "With a Twist" in the title is a warning that this one is different. Suki, her mother Jung and her two best friends, Patricia and Samantha, are radically different.

    Jung runs a full-service party firm, same as the original series. Wedding planning, office parties, catering and companionship are all supplied by her firm. Her age is fuzzy in this one again too.

    Suki's job is much different. In the original series she worked in the office, did lots of the party planning and she was a researcher "on the side." The twist in the new books, she is a Vice President by title only and actually works the parties. No PhD, no real college, not a scientist either. The book opens with her in the new position.

    She is always behind on her bills and enjoys recreational drugs. She also has a large car collection, only imports are mentioned and she hates American cars, she ain't no Jeep girl. The last part was a shock, but it turns out to be important. Her heels got taller too. She is always in 6" heels now.

    Suki is 24 this time.

    Patricia is still a CPA, but she works the parties on the side, like Suki and Samantha.

    Samantha is married to Patricia, something else legal in the future. She is still a secretary for a law firm. She and Jung are Suki's best advisors.

    John Tagliaferro is very much like the John from the original series, but he does some recreational drugs. A major difference from the original series, he has an intimate relationship with Jung before meeting Suki. He is 46 this time. For some reason I noticed that the relative ages of John and Suki stay consistent with the original.

    Jackie is mentioned, she is still building security for John's condo building and comes across as John's best friend. That might just be me from knowing the other books so well. They are very friendly.

    The locations are pretty much the same. Suki's apartment is down the street from her office, I think John's condo is still in Rosslyn but don't remember if that detail is mentioned.

    Trish and Sam have a house together near Crystal City.

    Suki, Patricia and Samantha do not have a set happy hour place anymore. They meet different places every Tuesday.

    The gadgets:
    John continued with things he thought of in the first series. Outfits that morph colors electronically, home automation, etc. He also brought in some of the things Sarah and I used in our fan fiction. "Gogs" are now contact lenses with a display, along with ear buds. They are controlled with either eye or hand movements. I think Suki changed her wig color with a smile once. Suki also has a mask and bodysuit that gives her the appearance of being mixed race for a special night she planned for John.

    The plot:
    Suki is sick of her job and is seeking real intimacy. She gets advice from her friends and mother who point her in the right direction. Jung tells Suki where she might run into a particular man who might be just the thing, at least temporarily.

    Suki meets John and they hit it off right away, they travel together to San Francisco on their second date. It is a working weekend for John and that they both have a great time together. A new career opportunity for Suki unfolds too.

    The book ends with Suki and John looking forward to their next date.

    Like mentioned at the top, if there was not a part two around the corner, this would have been a big letdown. Right now, it is a great story that leaves me wanting more.